“It’s okay, it’s the second one.”
I heard this from my SIL the other day. I have heard it from my parents in relation to me. I have heard it from friends. You ‘care less’ about the second child. Now, I’m not saying that in the literal sense you ‘care less’ – but I think you parents know what I mean when I say second child syndrome. The first child was the learning experience; you learned how to hold them, feed them, and burp them. You mastered the one-handed diaper change. You learned that if they fall, they will get back up. You learned that you don’t need to worry that you might fail at some things – because it’s inevitable that you will. You learned that you could and did adapt to being a new parent. So, once the second one came around, you were a Pro.
My brother’s second child and my newest nephew joined our family just before Christmas last year. For almost 4 years, his brother was the only baby in our family and we didn’t think we could love another more. Then, the second one arrived and I was smitten. There’s just something about him that I have instantly fallen in love with. It’s almost like there’s an unspoken bond between us. I’m the baby of the family; the black sheep – and I think I see that in him. As the youngest, we must stick together.
I was pondering my instant affection for him the other day, and realized that when his older brother was born I had to learn how to be an Aunt. I too had to learn how to hold, feed and burp him. I had to learn how to be a friend and role model to an easily influenced little human. I quickly got comfortable with talking in a kid-friendly voice, helping him put on his shoes and being stern with him when required. Perhaps I do in fact have a special bond with the second one, or perhaps this time around as an Aunt I’m just more comfortable and have become a Pro too.
Did you feel differently towards your second child?
About the Author:
Diane Morris is a PANK; Professional Aunt, No Kids and works for Mabel’s Labels as the Sales Coordinator. She’s an Aunt to two boys, and an “Auntie” to her boyfriend’s niece and nephew. She’s a sucker for romance, country music and peanut butter.