Mom Advice: Connecting with Your Partner

robb and stacey at el yunque

As I write this, I am sitting in a Puerto Rican resort room, looking out of the Carribean Sea. It's the trip of a lifetime, really, won by my husband through an incentive program at work. We've been here for a week, having a great time and making some amazing memories.

But right before we left home, I had a surprising, yet realistic fear: what on earth would we talk about for an entire week, just the two of us? With no constant distractions and responsibilities to buffer the space between us, would we remember how to just be two married people?

Sometimes as women, partners, and mothers, it becomes all too easy to neglect the relationship we have with our significant others. I know for us, nearly every conversation is about the kids, our schedules, the bills, or something that needs to be fixed, done, negotiated, or attended to. And our door revolves on such a fast track that even when we do get a date night out, it's usually just a bite to eat and then home again.

So to be in a car, driving the mountains of Puerto Rico, with no kids asking for a pit stop or when they can eat or if we would put on another movie, I honestly wondered if my husband and I would be able to rediscover other topics of conversation.

And you know what? We did.

We talked about all sorts of things, sharing our observations and opinions, laughing more than we probably have in far too long, and rediscovering the particular ways in which we complement each other's personalities.

I know how incredibly lucky we were to have won this trip to Puerto Rico. But I don't think it requires a trip to a tropical island to reconnect with your partner. First I think it requires a commitment to staying connected in the first place, and then the awareness to know when you as a couple need to stop and recharge. That can happen without even leaving your home or by not traveling much farther than your city limits. It just needs to happen. After having this week with my husband, I know it can make all the difference.

You can connect with Stacey on her personal blog, Tree, Root, and Twig, or on Twitter and

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