By Lisa Van Meeteren
If Halloween and I were in a relationship we’d probably need counselling. That’s because while I can get into the Halloween spirit like anyone else, helping my kids come up with Halloween costume ideas and putting up Halloween decorations there are still parts of it that I don’t like and things about it that confuse me…I told you it’s complicated. Read on to find out what I love, what I like, things I’m not crazy about and things that confuse me, to see if you can relate.
What I love:
Halloween was the first time my husband told me he loved me when we were dating. And FYI he was dressed like a priest and I was wearing a Catholic school girl uniform. I know. That’s why it took me a week to say it back. I wanted to make sure he loved me. Not the fantasy…
Being a kid and dragging a pillowcase behind me full of candy and just as I felt like my legs couldn’t go one step further, my Dad would lift me up and carry me on his shoulders, pillowcase and all.
Sharing that same candy with my best friend who wasn’t allowed to go out for Halloween.
Making new memories:
Watching my kids get dressed in their costumes, decorate and get excited.
What I like:
Cobwebs in your house become homemade Halloween decorations (I think I heard this on T.V, and realized that yes there are a lot of decorations in my house.)
A bad hair day becomes a good hair day-if I wake up looking like road kill I can just call it a costume!
Pumpkin seeds- I love these suckers roasted with some sea salt! It almost makes pulling out the goopy strain pulp worth it.
Watching other people carve pumpkins- or better yet watching as my husband tries to use one of those pumpkin carving stencils and not lose his patience. I know it’s a bit sadistic but hey it’s Halloween!
Halloween Horrors! What I don’t like:
Dressing up. I know. Boo me. It always makes me feel silly. The odd thing is I like acting and don’t mind donning a costume on stage but in real life no thanks. Even as a kid my costumes were lame. Cow girl anyone (yes it’s jeans a scarf and a hat-about how far I was willing go in order to get candy.) I am an expert at easy Halloween costumes. One year when my daughter was a toddler and didn’t want to put on her costume, I pulled a robe on over her jammies, and tossed a roller in her hair and let her just got to one house.
Me! Or at least the person that takes over my body as I try to get the kids ready on Halloween night. That person runs around like a headless chicken searching through the freezer for hot dogs or pizza or some other nutritionally defunct fare that can be ready in ten minutes and gobbled down in five while simultaneously searching for missing parts of costumes. That person looks like someone from the night of the living dead with wild eyes, that bug out, yelling, “Hurry Up!” every five minutes in a voice so high that it alerts the dogs in the neighbourhood and generally acts like her kids are going to be late for their stage debut on Broadway.
Rude kids or kids that look like they could shop at the LCBO and not get carded. How come there are still teenagers who look like they are old enough to sport mustaches ringing my bell and asking me for candy at 9:30? Half of them have jobs and probably make more than I do. Go home. Go to a party. Leave me alone.
Candy fights. No I don’t mean we throw chocolate bars at each other. (Hmmm date night?) I mean getting asked every day by my kids if they can have a candy in their lunch like other kids, me saying no, them whining…you get the picture.
Sneaking candy. Not the kids. ME!! I tell myself every year…thou shalt not eat a bowl of mini-chocolate bars just like thou wouldn’t eat more than one regular chocolate bar at a time. Those little suckers are dangerous. Logically I know that just because they are the mini version doesn’t mean I should sit down to a whole bowl of them- I mean pizza pockets are the small version of pizza but I wouldn’t scarf down an entire box at one sitting.
So that’s it my dysfunctional love/hate relationship with Halloween. The good, the bad, and the mini chocolate bar bad…
Happy Halloween! Are there also some things that make you anti-Halloween? What are some things you love, like, or dislike? Do you have any special Halloween memories you’d like to share?
About the Author
Lisa Van Meeteren is the mother of two children, ages 5 and 9. She works as a copywriter and has just completed a novel!