Grocery Shopping, UHG

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By Theresa  Albert, Toronto Nutritionist

www.myfriendinfood.com

One of the nastiest tasks in a parent’s week is grocery shopping. Don’t get me wrong, when I have the time, I love nothing more than wandering the aisles and reading labels trolling for new options. The trouble is most weeks don’t allow that “enough time” element. And, there are people who simply detest the entire process perceiving it as a chore. Or worse, those who are forced to shop for food with a toddler who is enticed by all the pretty colored packages at his eye level?

It is that very speed of life that opened the door to the “shortcuts” that that now grace our shelves. The convenience foods, frozen foods and “Home Meal Replacements” have grown to fill the gap that time took away.  It appears to be easier to grab one package of, say, lasagna than to buy meat, cheese, tomato sauce, and noodles separately.  But at what cost? Flavor? Nutrients? Sodium Levels? Fat levels? The risk of overweight and yet undernourished children?

So how does a parent walk the line? Here are some tips:

  • Use some packaged foods judiciously to fill the gap but be sure to load up with fresh fruits and vegetables.
  • Take the time to read the labels of your favorite foods at least once and watch for any changes. You really do want to know how many calories and/or sodium is in a reasonable serving before you serve it to your child. That is the only way to gauge how much is too much and look for other better ways to fill the plate.
  • Find brands that you can trust. There are manufacturers out there who are working really hard to earn your dollar. Some that claim to save your dollar are moving in the wrong direction.  I know it is tempting but you don’t want cheap food, you do want good food. The cheap food comes with a hefty cost in the long run.
  • Don’t buy any packaged meal that doesn’t contain fibre. All whole foods start off with fibre, processing often removes it and what you end up with is soft and nutrition free “food” that is filled with fat and salt.
  • Watch for sodium levels. Packages have to have a % amount of sodium, just remember that these numbers are for adults, even when on a kid package.  A child’s tolerance is lower and the last thing we want is to set them up for a salty journey.  If a food they love is too high in salt, find a way to spread it out, one slice of pizza cut into tiny squares on a platter with carrot sticks, celery sticks and hummus. This is much better than two slices of pizza and hoping for the best.
  • Anything can be improved.  Just think outside the box! Fruit or veggie add in’s take seconds and can make or break a meal. Take a look at this tweaked mac and cheese:

 

Better Packaged Mac and Cheese  

Even the ubiquitous mac and cheese comes in a whole grain version now and a few tweaks can make it even better.

1              package whole grain mac and cheese

¼             cup grated low fat mozzarella

¼             cup         frozen squash, warmed and mashed (or jarred baby food)

¼             cup         frozen peas, warmed

¼             cup         wheat germ

1                grated apple

Make mac and cheese as per package directions but omit the butter or margarine.  Once cooked, stir grated cheese and mashed squash into the sauce.  Stir in peas.  Mix together wheat germ and grated apple and top the bowl.

Note:  If time allows, do this in a casserole dish to crisp up the topping in the oven at 400 for 10 minutes.

 

About the Author:

Theresa Albert

Theresa Albert

Theresa Albert is a nutritionist and food communications consultant. Her Food Network show,Just One Bite! aired for 5 years on both Food Network and BBC Kids. She is currently a trusted on-camera correspondent for CTV Newschannel as well as CBC and regular health expert on the daily lifestyle show, Steven and Chris which airs internationally.

Named one of Canada’s Top 25 Tweeters by Today’s Parent Magazine and one of Savvymom.ca’s 35 Favorite Bloggers, she is called for comment from every major magazine, newspaper and television outlet in Canada. She has a weekly column in the Metro Newspaper and regularly writes features for Today’s Parent, Canadian Family Magazine and blogs at Huffington Post.

 

How Many Kids? Is There a Magic Number?

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According to a recent study, the most stressful number of kids to have is three.

I remember being a mom of one—though it wasn’t for long—and finding it difficult. Truthfully, I didn’t find it exciting enough, and there were times it could be quite boring. When I look back now, and think of how I was juggling a baby and law school, I wonder how the word boredom ever factored in. These days, I’d jump for a warm serving of boring.

I was a happier mom once my second child arrived, 15 months after my first. Even after suffering a miscarriage after we had our first baby, there was still a very small age gap. It goes without saying, our third baby came not all that longer after the second.

And yes, three was stressful, but I found it was more about the circumstances than it was about the numbers. I was living far away from my family, had three babies under three, and my eldest was well on his way to an autism diagnosis. There were no fancy three-kid strollers back in those days, so Daddy-o had to create a make-shift triple stroller that involved a child’s plastic lawn chair with a harness—those were not glamorous days.

If I were to offer a theory on family size and stress, it’s less about the numbers and more about closeness in age and how much support someone has at the time.

Saying that, I can see how three would be considered the most stressful number of children for some families:

  1. It’s a parent personality thing. Kids don’t stress me out the way they do many parents. If I had been stressed at three, I would have stopped. So, yeah—people with more than three kids are probably less likely to stress out about kids. You have to be tolerant of a certain chaos levels when you have a big family. It can absolutely be too much to take.
  2. Maybe some people with three kids like the “idea” of a big family, but two really was enough —so that third stresses them out. With kids, you have to like more than the “idea” of it, because the reality can be bigger than you ever imagined.

Did you have a “perfect” number in mind when you started your family? Is there a number of children you found particularly stressful?

The Good Divorce

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You may have decided to end your marriage, but with a young family, you still face years of co-parenting with your ex. There are ways of having a good divorce and raising happy children with minimal emotional upset.

Here are some best practices to set you on the right path:

  • Let the kids come first. You may disagree on a lot, but at least try to agree that the children come first and the adults emotional baggage and private agendas come second.
  • Use collaborative law. Utilize the new collaborative law and mediation processes. Your separation will be more amicable. The legal bills really hurt the economic backbone of a family and your children will ultimately pay the price.
  • Get counseling. Even the best, conflict-free divorces benefit from having a professional help family members transition out of the nuclear family and into their new arrangements.  Grieving the life you had and working to create a new vision of the future will help everyone land more gently.
  • Act happy (even if you have to fake it). The most stressful problem for children is seeing their parents in conflict and feeling split loyalties. Kids love both their moms and dads, so if they see divisiveness, they don’t know where to place their affections. If they love Mom, it’s an act of going against Dad and vice versa. This is the hardest emotional bind for a child. Instead, show your children you both get along (or at least don’t hate one another). That means no bad-mouthing the other parent, no dirty looks, or asking the child to deliver snarky messages or spy on the other.
  • Agree to disagree. I promise you, it’s the actual fighting and conflict about minutiae (like how to handle homework, discipline differences, bedtimes, what the kids eat etc.) that hurts kids, not the staying up late, watching Call of Duty, and skipping assignments. Let the other parent do things their own way and support the idea that kids can handle two houses having two different styles and rules. Decide what’s worth fighting for. If you agree you should not “sweat the small stuff”, but you wonder what is “small”, let me share what courts agree you should speak up about.
  1. Safety: ­Abuse or neglect
  2. Travel:­ Extensively being away, distant, remote or unreachable
  3. Health:­ Refusing chemotherapy, blood transfusions, vaccinations, etc.
  4. Education:­ Sending them away to boarding school/military school or other non-main stream settings
  5. Religion:­ Excessive pressure or conversion to a known religious cult or extremist group

Are you getting a sense of the scale now? So, fighting about trans fats in fast food isn’t the way to go. You’ll probably do more psychological damage to your toddler watching you bicker over it.

 

About the Author:

Alyson Schafer

Alyson Schafer

Alyson Schafer is a psychotherapist and one of Canada’s most notable parenting experts. She is the resident expert on The Marilyn Denis Show, CTV News Channel and CBC’s The World This Weekend. Alyson is an “Ask an Expert” Columnist for Today’s Parent Magazine, and sits on the Health Advisory Board for Chatelaine Magazine.  Alyson is the best selling author of “Breaking The Good Mom Myth” and “Honey, I Wrecked The Kids” and her latest, “Ain’t MIsbehavin”.  She is an international speaker including the inaugural TEDxKids in Brussels and offers free parenting tips at www.alysonschafer.com.

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